Monday, December 20, 2010

Parker Michael - Iphone Pictures

The picture above is the crib that the kids decorated with their animals for Parker. The notes we have on Parker state that he sleeps with his foster mom, "Ma," so we will probably move the crib out later today.
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We had to wait until noon, so while we waited, the kids got in bed together and talked about how they would act when Parker came. Unfortunately, we were not anticipating the level of terror he had when we came :(
This is how Parker was for the first hour or so, when I was not trying to hold him. He thinks his foster mom, "Ma," is in the closet and he bangs on it and looks through the crack screaming and begging her to come get him. When I open the door, he crumbles to the ground and screams. This is so hard to see. The kids did great - we took them out for two breaks, but other than that they were here. The only good aspect to this is that he obviously loves Ma very much so hopefully attachment will go well after he grieves.

Parker came to us in the traditional Chinese winter outfit - many many many layers of split pants. He even is wearing the big bib quilted overalls. He was fighting me the whole time I was trying to get him undressed. I would have given him more time, but it was so hot in here and he was so hysterical that I was afraid he was going to throw up. He seemed to feel better once I got off the 4 quilted layers.

Once I got him undressed (the kids were on a break) I put him in just a t-shirt to cool down.


More of our morning - sorry the pictures are so bad. We only have our IPhone since our camera broke. Uggh!

After the bath, we set him down in the bed and he FINALLY stopped crying. Poor little guy is just heartbroken and terrified.

Mike was the first one to be able to break through to him and it happened over a pair of Sponge Bob shoes. I had showed them to him, but he hit them out of my hands. Mike tried about 30 minutes later and he let him put them on his feet - all while screaming. We could tell he liked them because although he was screaming, he would rotate his ankles so we could see him.

Do you notice what is in his hands. He came to us screaming and gripping Percy and a cargo train. We had sent them in one of his packages. He has refused to put them down since he got here. When Mike pretends he wants one, Parker screams and puts his hands behind his head. Now that he is sleeping, we can see just how sweet and adorable he is. Thank goodness I brought the Vaseline for those cheeks. They feel like sand paper.



10 comments:

Heather said...

Our Lily had a terrible time adjusting. But as you know it is worth it in the end.

Jason was alone and I'm not sure how he did it. One day she cried herself to sleep standing up in her crib. He had tried everything- holding, letting her sleep in the big bed with him, going to the crib, in the end she did find sleep standing. These are such traumatic moments for them- they just don't know how much love surrounds them. Lily was also in foster care and extremely LOVED by her Ma.

I hope each day, he sees more and more of the love all 4 of you have for him. Hang in there
- Heather

Heather said...

Oh Ashley! You already know he's absolutely adorable! Those sweet chubby cheeks! My heart is so sad for his heartbreak and yet happy for all of you together at last!! You all will remain in my prayers! Merry Christmas!!!

Larken said...

Ash, he is beautiful! I hope today goes better for you, I can't imagine how hard that must be for him to be so upset and nothing you can do to fix it.

joanna and scott said...

Ohhh, sweet baby!! Sounds like you are doing everything right, it will take time. Like you said, it's a good sign that he's so upset, he's formed a bond and soon that bond will be transferred to his new family!! He's a beautiful little guy, can't wait to see how's he's doing in the next few days. Lots of prayers and hugs to you all!!! Joanna

Full Time Advocate said...

Ashley,
You family is in my prayers. I can't imagine what Parker is feeling right now. But I know that you'll be able to love him into attachment and he WILL be okay.

Donna said...

He is adorable!! Hang in there, the grieving should get a little less intense each and every day.

mom2K&L said...

We feel your pain. Kinlee was pretty distraught when she joined us. You feel so bad for them and want to help. It was hard for Levi too because he couldn't understand why she was so upset. Thankfully things turned around pretty quickly and have improved immensely since then. We'll be thinking of you and praying that Parker will adjust quickly. He is a handsome little guy!
Lisa & Mark

Lisa and Family said...

Ashley - he is just beautiful!! Tears and red cheeks aside - he looks like an angel.

Chan said...

Poor baby. He is so adorable. Can't wait to meet him! Please let me know if you need any help when you get back.

Debbie Sauer said...

He is so precious. Congratulations. I'm sure with your love and patience every day will get better. Looking forward to more pics and updates. Merry Christmas. Blessings